WHY TEACH CHILDREN ABOUT FEELINGS?

Feelings are what make us human! We all have them. We all experience them. There are no “good or bad” feelings, rather “good” or “bad” responses to them.

It is okay to feel angry, but it is not okay to hit people, while we feel upset. And here is where the teaching lies. What do we expect kids to do when they feel mad? What is the “appropriate” response to angry feeling? What self-regulating and calming strategies are we teaching our kids?

So often, we shut our children’s emotions by dismissing their feelings: “stop crying”, “quit doing this”, or “you have no reason to be upset”, which only triggers the kids even more and is not teaching them anything.

Here is your guide on how to start talking about feelings.

I like to think of feelings as messages carrying something important for us to notice.

1. Notice how and where in your body do you feel your feelings

   TIP: use mirror for children to see their faces when acting specific feelings

2. Name your feelings

   TIP: with young children teach only 4 emotions to avoid confusion (angry, sad, scared, happy) and talk about what situations trigger which feelings.

3. Teach how to calm down

TIP: breathing is the best way to self-regulation, but there are many other ways to relax: listening to music, drawings, go for walk, alone time, get a hug, use playdough, etc.

IMPORTANT: All the teaching must be done when the children are calm and relaxed! And when they are triggered and dysregulated, you can calmly remind them of the ways that can help their bodies to calm down.