WHAT YOU’RE GETTING WRONG ABOUT MEDITATION
There is an interesting paradox happening with the topic of meditation. This is a practice that is supposed to help us feel more grounded, relaxed, and reduce stress, but the reality is that we build up certain expectations about what it’s supposed to look like and then judge ourselves if we don’t meet those expectations.
Cue the guilt, frustration and not-relaxed feelings. Doesn’t seem to make a whole lot of sense now, does it?
It doesn’t have to be this way! Keep reading below to learn about some different ways you can get into a meditative state.
There isn’t a “wrong” way. Really. So get the idea out of your head that you’re “doing it wrong,” or “can’t do it,” or “meditation is NOT for me!” Traditionally, people think that meditation means you sit down for a long time, close your eyes, and “clear your mind.” That’s an unrealistic expectation, so of course it would be difficult, especially for beginners. It’s more helpful to notice your thoughts as they come, and notice what’s happening in your body, your mind, etc.
The point is to create the stillness and pause that you normally wouldn’t with our busy lives so that all of this can come to the surface. Over time, you get better and better at allowing these thoughts and sensations to come and then go. You can build up a tolerance for discomfort or stress.
You can do also do guided meditations, breathwork, focus on a mantra or phrase, but again, this is similar in structure to the free form insight meditation above, where you sit and close your eyes. BUT, that kind of meditation isn’t for everyone.
You don’t have to be seated if you’ve tried it and are frustrated or just the thought of sitting for any stretch makes you go bonkers.
Here are just a few different examples of how you can get into a meditative state, where the goal is to focus on something and train the mind to filter out outside clutter, leading to more calm:
Walking or running.
Working with your hands, for example, in the garden, woodworking, sculpting.
Creating art.
Cooking or baking.
Playing.
Making music.
What other ideas can you think of? If you stop and think about it, you may already have activities that you’ve done in the past that relax you, help you to focus, or bring about a slightly altered state where you can manage stress in ways that you wouldn’t otherwise. Try them out and pay attention to how you feel afterwards. This is the added bonus of being more mindful. Meditation is not a one-size-fits-all practice. Try out different things and do what works for you!